Who is More Forgiving: Men or Women? [blog/reflection]
When trust has been broken, forgiveness is probably the last thing on your mind. You’re not alone. Many of us have felt like that at one time or another. But who do you think is more forgiving? Men or women? Before you answer, let me share some information with you.
Believe it or not, some researchers say that the ability to forgive is gender-based. Their studies show that between the two sexes, women find forgiveness easier than men. Now fellas, before you start fussing and disagreeing, please hear me out.
Apparently, it all boils down to who holds a grudge longer. According to Science Daily, reports show that women forgive quicker because they view forgiveness differently than men. The parameters for forgiveness in this research included reconciliation, empathy, and not holding a grudge. Women are considered more empathetic than men, which figures greatly into their capacity to forgive.
A woman wants to maintain or salvage a broken relationship in more cases than men. So, she’ll forgive quicker and will feel good about her efforts. A man, however, tends to feel a sense of loss or defeat when he forgives, so he’ll hold onto the grudge longer.
The study goes on to say that men are more conscious of their status and how their position of power is perceived. It is a vulnerability that pride or ego may have a hard time accepting. In a nutshell, this is why researchers say that men are slow to forgive.
Now, some of you may say ‘hogwash’ to these findings, but there is one thing you should all agree on. There is NO power when holding on to grudges, bitterness and resentment. The power is actually held by the one who can forgive, heal and move on.
Just remember, whether you are man or woman, no one is perfect and we all make mistakes. Keep that in mind the next time someone has offended you. There may have been a time when you’re the one afflicting pain onto someone else. Now wouldn’t you want to be forgiven?
I’m sure there are plenty of exceptions and feedback, so let’s hear from you. Let me know what you think? Do you agree that women forgive quicker than men?