A few days ago, I watched the episode of Love & Hip Hop Hollywood (don’t judge me) and was really surprised by a relationship I saw play out.  Two of the many women on the show, Hazel E and Teairra, are friends whose friendship has completely turned volatile and aggressive (or maybe it always was).  These two women have been friends for some time and have lived together for the past 2 years.

Their relationship, as it’s playing out on the show, it falling to its demise due to Teairra believing Hazel E is in a relationship with a man that is not serious/committed in comparison to Teairra’s own relationship with her ex-boyfriend (which she considers more serious) .  Hazel E, of course, is offended.  And I honestly, feel ridiculous typing that out.  These women are in their thirties.  And to see them argue and curse each other out, to the point of Hazel E saying, “you wanna see me!?” (as in fight), was disturbing.  But that’s where they are, and that’s how they felt.

In watching it, it brought to mind how we deal with conflict and what end result becomes of it.  Whenever I see people, especially friends, have really ugly arguments, I tend to wonder, will forgiveness grow here?  And I ask it because words hurt and many of us have trouble letting things go.   We say things like “I keep my friends close, and my enemies closer,” “I forgive but I wont forget,” “I’ll remember that,” we keep a watchful eye on each other, and so on.   And sometimes we choose not to forgive, we forgive quickly (at times too quickly), or we don’t know how to truly forgive at all.

Even in the muck and mire of relationships, what I do know is, forgiveness is a necessity.  WHEN forgiveness happens is up to you.  And so is the WHO (forgiving you, the other person, or both).  And especially the HOW (it likely looks different for each of us depending on the situation).

In order to have healthy relationships and a healthy state of mind and heart, forgiveness is imperative.

What are your thoughts on forgiveness?  What’s your experience with forgiveness when the situation was really bad?  Let us know below!

-Full episodes of Love & Hip Hop Hollywood here (watch at your own risk and no, this is not encouragement)